How do you Live?

What mindset do you live from? When awakening to your higher consciousness, this question is crucial for becoming self-aware. If you’re not sure, listen to your thoughts. They will reveal your beliefs about life, your self-perceptions, and your preferences. Do you unconsciously obey, reacting to situations you find difficult or uncomfortable? Do you resist emotional or mental pain and want nothing to do with it? Or do you turn inward, listening to the quiet inner voice of your Soul? Listening and becoming aware is the key.

I ask you these questions because it’s how I awakened to my true identity as higher consciousness. When I paid attention to the thoughts that played in my mind, I discovered how cruel they were. Remember, I was not like other people because I had been trained from infancy, before cognitive thought, that cruelty and lack were the realities of life. I learned to be on guard, to trust the fear that warned me to be afraid. It seemed to me my mind had a valid reason to shout its ugly commands at me, so I obeyed them.

When I began my journey of awakening, I was extremely fragmented, having over 300 distinct personalities. It took me years to focus effectively. That is not an exaggeration. I was constantly switching into different personalities, and if truth be told, I loved being numb. Switching provided me with that luxury, letting me exist without too much pain, but that was a lie I was telling myself. I discovered that by obeying the commands of my mind, I had become my own abuser, long after the abuse had ended.

Choosing to do things differently rather than blindly obeying my mind meant I had to pay attention to what I thought. I learned that each thought I had created a painful emotion in my body, which then pushed me to find ways to cope with it. It was an endless cycle of repetition, running from myself in the hopes I could escape the pain.

As I learned to slow things down, I came to understand that the painful emotion was a clue that I was believing my cruel mind again. I knew that my mind’s thoughts were filled with anger, prejudice, fear, cruelty, and condemnation, so following its beliefs would result in more pain. I was tired of living this way. Disentangling those unconscious thoughts and beliefs took considerable patience on my part.

But through my determination, I discovered a new way to live. Through the compassionate breath technique (which you can learn for free on my website, iamserenabook.com), I became grounded in a reality of safety and kindness. I began to discern how my mind's thoughts felt vs. the words of my Soul. Through practice, I began to hear her quiet, still voice, and this awareness filled me with confidence and strength, enabling me to continue my healing journey.

When I suggest that you practice this daily, I mean taking the time to listen to what you are reacting to. Are you obeying your mind that says it's your fault? Are you agreeing with its cruel judgment? When your mind tells you someone doesn’t like you, do you quickly entertain ways to get that person to like you? Do you try to fix a situation so you won’t be uncomfortable? Does comfort win out over your choice to become awakened? Are you willing to step out of the box of normalcy and be outrageous?

One technique I used to slow things down was to use paper and pen for clarity. I drew a line down the middle of the page, and wrote on one side what my mind was telling me, and then on the other side, I wrote what my Soul was telling me. I was surprised by how different the two felt. If you don’t hear words from your Soul, then sense, through breath, are the mind’s words valid from the awareness of Soul energy? Ask your Soul to speak to you so you can hear it. Ask your Soul for guidance. Ask your Soul if the statement you just wrote is true. Then wait, feel how your body responds to your question. Does it constrict with the mind’s words, or does it feel open? Dialogue with your Soul, so you can feel its presence in your physicality.

This will require your time, effort, and focus. Your mind will push you to hurry; it will tell you that you have something better to do. Your mind may be loud, trying to elicit a reaction to force you from the task at hand. This is where your passion to heal, to awaken, and finally be done with coping determines your choice.

The times I chose to listen, to be uncomfortable even though my mind was pushing me, were more than the times I ran. But every time I got distracted, running from the discomfort, I would eventually return to try again. I did this repeatedly, over the years, until the quiet, still voice of my Soul replaced my old mind’s voice entirely.

Today, I am filled with the assurance that all is well and that I am safe. I am held in a steady awareness of trust, which enables me to show up in my life without a plan. I am open and excited to see how my day will unfold. It is a way of being free that I could never have dreamt of.

You know the saying, “Yea, though I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil?” When this inner quiet knowing becomes your identity, when you know without reservation who you are as Divine Essence in physical form, you will know authentic peace. It will radiate through your body and mind, replacing the old fear-based control game. Your old identity will melt as true consciousness is gently, compassionately birthed within you. I share this to inspire you to keep opening to who you truly are. I promise that if you practice this daily, you will transform your fearful, anxious mind into new, awakened consciousness.

Does this seem like a lot of work? If your answer is yes, I completely understand! Only when we tire of the old way of living do we seek new answers. Only when the pain of doing it the same old way becomes intolerable do we change. I know this without a shadow of a doubt. That’s why I have no judgment of someone else’s choices. I sometimes wonder if I hadn’t had such a painful life, would I have preferred to remain unconscious, living life in a state of semi-numbness? My pain was extreme, my life was completely destabilized, so I had to do it differently or die. I don’t regret one moment of my life; I trust how it unfolded, because each moment I experienced brought me to this sweet awareness that I am Soul, living life in human form. I get to play and discover what life has in store for me from conscious, compassionate choice, and that is true freedom.